Life with a baby

So, I've been wanting to write on here for some time now. But dagummit, did you know little babies are time-consumin' little critters?!  (that apparently make you talk like Yosemite Sam for some reason..?) But seriously, it's like babies can't do anything for themselves. They're all like 'I'm hungry!' or 'I'm bored!' or 'I'm tired but I refuse to go to sleep and you can't make me!' Well, baby, yes we can, but it's going to take an undetermined amount of pacing and rocking and bouncing and patting and singing and water noise and-- can't you see that it would save us both a lot of time if you would just skip straight to the sleeping part??

I remember a time, when I thought to myself- 'wow, going from working full time to maternity leave, I'm going to have like soo much free time! Think of all the projects I'm gonna get done!' No, the only project-ing I'm doing is when I'm yelling at Sean to come grab me something two feet away because I'm feeding her and I'll be darned if I'm going to break her latch! (get it? 'projecting'? Word play...)

Turns out Everyone is right. Everyone said a newborn is tough. We just thought 'ya, ya..we'll lose some sleep, whatever' but no. We had no idea. Especially with this being baby number one. I am constantly praying-'Please don't make Avery suffer because I don't know exactly what I'm doing!' Oh, and thank goodness for Google. Seriously.

But Everyone was right about another thing- it gets easier. I feel like we're really getting a handle on this whole parenting thing lately. We know the difference between a hungry cry and a tired cry, we can pop her in and out of her car seat with the best of them, and we know to rush her into a diaper post-bath time. Not to mention we totally feel like parents now. The other day we left her at my parents' house for like an hour while we ran to the store, and it felt crazy weird not having her there. She's just a part of our family! And it's pretty strange to think of her not being with us. I mean, there's still a lot we're learning each day and we're not pros by any means but.. we're doing it, we're really doing it.

Oh, and Everyone was right about one more thing: it's all worth it.  The way she looks at me, just completely trusting me to take care of her, melts my heart every time. And each smile and giggle completely erases any less-pleasant memories of crying fits or sleepless nights or spit up-covered clothes. It is so cliche, but I love her more than I knew was possible!

..and with that, she is awake, and it looks like I am out of time. So here's just a couple funny pictures. (I'm posting from my phone so hopefully they'll work) See, tomorrow is her blessing, so we were playing dress up. First we tried the glamorous pilgrim bonnet that came with her dress--she wasn't a fan. (I actually usually like the little bonnet look cuz that's what I wore for my blessing, but this one is admittedly a little odd.) Then we tried this headband she apparently has though I'm not sure from where. Well, she thought about it, and concluded the bow was a bit too big. So, looks like we will be headband hunting this afternoon...

Oh, and p.s.- today marks 6 weeks! Wow.

The 16th has come and gone...

To those who know me well, they knew that I was really hoping for baby girl to come on the 16th. There were several reasons for this:

1. 16 is my lucky number (I was born on the 16th). It just sounded like a good day.
2. This would be four days early. A safe amount of earliness. I don't think that any nine-month-pregnant lady would disagree that safe early is preferable over on time or late. It's like winning the baby lottery.
3. This would have made her come while Sean is on Spring Break, which would have just been so convenient. And children are supposed to be convenient, right?

Well, I promised her a car on her 16th birthday and everything but.. she's a no show. I mean, sure, who knows if I could follow through on that, but she couldn't have known that right? So in the words of Sean, she's already a disappointment to us.

... Okay, I feel heartless even just typing that as a joke. We don't mean it baby girl! If anything, we are blaming ourselves-- I mean, she is our child, so of course she's going to be late. (If she's more like her mother, she'll be 1-2 days late... if she's more like her father, she's going a good week over...  haha, he never reads these but when he does he's going to be so mad! So for when you do read this, Sean, I'm talking about dating Sean; you've improved greatly over these last few years... love you!)

So now that the 16th has gone, we are mentally preparing ourselves for the 27th. One week past my due date, when they would induce me, if it comes to that. I don't think it will, because it looks like everything's working fine and progressing, but... who knows. I was having all of these early labor signs a couple days ago that convinced me I was going to go early (the book said that "when ___ happens, usually labor follows within 24 hours"!) but, I've found that I apparently fall into the latter part of the sentence that I sort of conveniently skimmed over ("... though it could be another one to two weeks.")

Anyway, this whole ticking time bomb thing is quite the experience, such a mind game. It's like an unpredictable Christmas, only like Sean said-- "I've never had to wait this long for a present!"  I just have to keep telling myself that our little present has got to come out eventually, right???

Okay, well here's some pictures now.

 

This is a fun game I play in the mirror. It's called Front View...

Side view! This is at 36 1/2 weeks. Also, note the cute coat Sean picked out for me at Christmas all on his own. It's great because it's not maternity but totally works.

 

 Without the coat, for the full effect. I probably should have cropped these pictures.. meh.

 

Me and my basketball.

Some leftovers from the Baby Shower brunch the sweet ladies in my ward threw for me. And holy cow, those ladies can cook! This picture does not do this food justice. It was amazing.

The cake from my team on my last day of work before maternity leave. Also, very sweet. (I need to get the photos off of my work laptop still from the baby shower they threw me, but spoiler alert-- there was a dinosaur pinata. It was awesome. Now that I think about it, I don't think I've documented baby girl's nickname of "baby dinosaur"-- I will have to get to that later.)

This is at just about 39 weeks. Not the most flattering picture of me, but the face truly captures the disappointment and frustration and level of discomfort I am now feeling.

 

 Today, March 16th, 39 weeks and 3 days. The D-day that wasn't meant to be. The juxtaposition is a subtle hint that perhaps she would be more comfortable in her car seat?

Well, that's all for now. Here's hoping the next time I write it will be a post filled with photos of a cute healthy baby girl! In the mean time, I'm off to go do some more lunges and eat some more spicy food, pineapple and balsamic vinegar... (I know they're old wives tales, but it can't hurt right?)

T-Minus 6 Weeks...

... what on earth?!

I was just reading my last blog post from, oh, four months ago, and found myself just a smidge jealous of then-me. I was just starting my second trimester, feeling good and loving my tiny baby bump, and know what else I could do?? Walk! Like a normal person NOT doing an impersonation of a penguin. (I really tried to fight the waddle for as long as possible, but shoot... it's just easier to waddle.)

Oh, 16-weeks-pregnant Tiffany. How little you knew of what was to come...

Alright, honestly, I really shouldn't complain too much. My pregnancy has gone rather well, considering the horror stories I've heard from other people. But still, that doesn't mean that there hasn't been some side effects from growing a human. So while I shouldn't complain... I'm gonna. Just for a sec. Purely for documentation purposes.

(Warning: This gets long... but this is the price to pay for skipping four months.)

• I can't sleep anymore. Some nights are worse than others, but I can't remember the last time I didn't wake up at least once in the middle of the night. There's just so many reasons! I'm too uncomfortable, my hips are hurting, baby girl is kicking me awake, I'm too hot, my ribs are hurting, I have heartburn, I have to go to the bathroom, I can't breathe, or Sean had DelTaco, and even though he brushed his teeth AND used mouthwash, my super-smelling abilities can detect it from a mile away. It's really annoying, to both of us. The weirdest is that I've noticed a pattern this past week-- every night, I have been waking up at 3 a.m., 4:30 a.m., and then 6 a.m (give or take a few minutes). I thought maybe it had something to do with baby's sleeping patterns? But I don't always feel her moving when I wake up. So I'm really just not sure what that's all about... needless to say, I am getting pretty good at running on not a lot of sleep! I'm feeling like this might be good preparation for motherhood...
• I have a huge belly! The last blog post, 18 weeks ago, I was weighing 103. I am now a nice round 125 and rising. Considering I dipped down to 97, that means I have gained close to 30 pounds since then, and now roughly one-fourth of my body weight is protruding from my midsection. No wonder I feel like my back is going to snap in half, and when I'm walking I fear that the ligaments in my pelvis are going to stretch so far they finally snap. Oh, as for my waist size, I have gone from 25" to 40.5" as of this morning. And I still have almost six weeks left! Can I seriously handle getting any bigger?! Putting on shoes has become practically impossible.
• I find myself crying. Like a lot. Which is not normal for me. Both happy cries and sad cries, though the sad cries have come mostly from watching movies like Moulin Rouge (that was really rough) and TV shows like Extreme Home Makeover (a lady met the guy who donated bone marrow and saved her life... k, I'm not a robot!) Ha, oh ya.. and the end of Casper. I really lost it there too. But other than that, I really have done a pretty good job at not being overly emotional around/at Sean. No really, even ask him. Well, okay, there was this one week...yikes, not sure what my deal was then. Maybe don't bring it up after all. But c'mon, one week out of 34 is not too shabby.
• I am ON FIRE. Like, all the time. This is such a strange thing for me, I'm usually always cold. But nope, these days I'm the one asking Sean why he turned the heat up so high. Thank goodness it's winter...
• Recent development- there's been some slight swelling in my hands and feet. It's so slight that Sean's not sure he believes me, but I can tell. Well, and the fact that I can't take my rings off is kind of hard to dispute. But hey, the good news is that for the first time in ever, my wedding ring fits! (Thanks to my bony knuckles, my ring has to be a little bigger than would be ideal.)
• Other miscellany: For a few weeks I got this incredibly itchy rash thing on my shins. I did some internet research, and saw that it could be an allergic reaction to the fish oil I'd been taking. It got pretty unbearable, so I went to the dermatologist,  and he was incredibly unhelpful. ("Ya, sounds like you should try not taking fish oils... and moisturize your skin..." and then he prescribed me some fairly expensive anti-itch cream that I couldn't even end up taking because as I was reading the labels I discovered that it wasn't recommended for pregnant women because not enough research had been done on it, so "use at your own risk"... um, no thanks?) Well, luckily it did clear up, so it looks like fish oil was the culprit. Who knew? (Side note: I have some $60 anti-itch cream if anyone who is not pregnant is interested.)
• The kicking of the ribs. Oh, the kicking of the ribs... I remember someone on facebook posting something about how their baby was kicking their ribs, and I thought "oh.. but that's so cute! It can't hurt that bad..." I was so wrong. Well, I still think it's kind of cute, but I have been surprised how much of an impact her tiny little feet can make! I am convinced I am covered in bruises in there. Also, I love feeling her move, it's probably one of the most amazing/mind-blowing sensations to know that there's a life inside of you... but things are getting so cramped in there these days that sometimes it really hurts! Like when her legs have decided to give my ribs a break, and she moves on to kicking my stomach-- it makes me feel kind of nauseous. You know, like as if you were getting punched in the stomach. Actually, yes. It is exactly like that.
• OH! How could I forget?! Pregnant brain! Actually, that is the perfect example. I am so crazy forgetful these days. Also, kinda clumsy, and just in general, absent-minded. I could fill a whole blog post with funny anecdotes about this, and maybe someday I will, but I will sum it up by saying that a couple days ago I wore two completely different looking earrings. All day. And I had a vivid memory from that morning of them matching. That still blows my mind. Also, Sean holds his breath any time I go to pour any sort of drink, and usually insists on just doing it for me. I've been told this will not improve much in my future role as a mother, but... it just has to. I am willing it to get better. My poor coworkers deserve better grammar from me in my IM conversations with them. (I'm usually an extremely good and fast typist, but lately when I re-read things I know that I typed right.. there's like an entire word missing or something. You'll see. I'm sure I've done it several times already.)

But yes, other than those items, things are going really well. No complications have come up yet anyway, and our doctor keeps congratulating us on everything just going boringly according to plan. I'm really hoping that holds up as we get into these final weeks... two of my best friends just had their first babies and had some pretty serious stuff happen during their deliveries, so maybe with those odds I'll just be the one to get off relatively scot-free??

Oh, and as for cravings: nothing crazy, but I have found myself wanting milk like as much as possible. Which has led to me eating quite a lot of cold cereal. Also, chocolate. Though it's hard to know if that is the pregnancy or not... I mean, it is Cadbury egg season.

Alright, well that's a pretty good summary of my pregnancy I think. Long enough anyway. I will now move on to the photo portion of today's presentation. I call it...

SOME OF THE FEW PICTURES WE HAVE TAKEN SINCE OCTOBER

October 15th marked our two-year anniversary, and as tradition dictates, we spent the weekend in Park City. Here is Sean with the present I made him (well, I painted it at Color Me Mine).

 

We walked around Sundance a little bit, for sentimental reasons. Plus, nothing beats Sundance in the fall.

I thought I looked sooo pregnant.

 

Halloween: I dressed up like a mobster for work (wearing Sean's shirt and my black bella band as a cummerbund because my pants didn't zip up anymore...), and I brought in this burlap horse head I happened to find in my parents' basement.

Then I left it on my boss' desk with a threatening note. (It says "No more time sheets or else!", which is just this really monotonous task that we hate.) Apparently he hadn't seen The Godfather, and somehow didn't know the reference (I've never seen it either, but c'mon-- how you not know about the horse head scene??) so it made it even funnier because he had no idea who had done it, when it should have been pretty obvious. Also, I went up to visit Michelle at her desk and snuck up behind her and tossed the horse on her keyboard and scared the crap out of her. It was great.

 

Christmas: Company Work Party at the Zermatt. I am about 25 weeks here.

 

Playing Black Jack for gift cards with my bros Andrew and Adam and Creighton and Michelle. I was pretty much on a roll.

  

Christmas Day.

 

A really terrible phone picture from New Year's Eve at Brooke & Preston's wherein I look bald. It was a really fun night though; we played games, snacked, and toasted to a new year of being the coolest new parents ever. (She was a couple months more pregnant than me then---they just had their first little guy a week ago.)

 

At 30 weeks (and in front of the armoire we got for baby girl because we realized our second bedroom doesn't have a closet for some reason...)

 

I think this was just like 31 weeks-ish...

 

Last Saturday my sister Brittany/sister-in-law Tami/ Mom and other sisters hosted a wonderful baby shower for me!

 

The treats and decorations were amazing.

 

The turn out was great! The candid pictures that would prove that are not the most flattering though, so you will just have to believe me because check out our pile of pink loot!

Just some of my supporting friends!

At almost 34 weeks.

 

*****

Phew. I made it. And if you hung in there this long, way to go. Man, if only I didn't blog so infrequently, this wouldn't be so painful, right?! Why do I do this to myself... Well, while I'd like to say I'll do better, I can only say I'll try... so chances are I'll see you in another four months!

... okay, no but really, I'll try and do better. Especially once baby comes.

Which is SO SOON!! OH MY GOSH!! 37 more days!! 

...What on earth?!